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Forty Year Old Businessman Tells All.
As many of you know, I am no longer with the postal service. I am now a 40 year old businessman.
One part of my business is the hauling away of rubbish. I go to peoples' houses, load their crap into my trailer and they give me fat skads of cash. Most people's crap is just that, crap. Yesterday, however, a customer gave me some very prime crap indeed.
Not only did they offer me a cold drink and a hand loading the trailer (both of which I declined thankyou very much), they also gave me:
-a Bailey Industrial Extending Ladder (3.7m extends to 5.1m),
-a four person dome tent (better than the one my beloved already owns which is currently on loan of unspecified duration to brother-in-law),
-new storage crates for the van,
-four beech folding garden chairs (at least one of which I intend to spend tomorrow night in, happy new year everybody),
-various gardening implements(to be used by my business),
-lengths of chain (various link sizes),
-some nifty plumbing gear,
-assorted handy stuff of no consequence,
-an irrigation system,
-the dearest little skateboard,
-and (strap yourselves into the green seat of envy everybody) a fuck-off-big Dawn engineering vice.
Did I mention they also gave me money?
On an entirely unrelated note, if anybody wants to borrow, rent or buy a Bailey Industrial Extending Ladder(3.7m, flops out to be a real beauty*) feel free to contact me.
10B
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*Thankyou Lounge Discounter.
One part of my business is the hauling away of rubbish. I go to peoples' houses, load their crap into my trailer and they give me fat skads of cash. Most people's crap is just that, crap. Yesterday, however, a customer gave me some very prime crap indeed.
Not only did they offer me a cold drink and a hand loading the trailer (both of which I declined thankyou very much), they also gave me:
-a Bailey Industrial Extending Ladder (3.7m extends to 5.1m),
-a four person dome tent (better than the one my beloved already owns which is currently on loan of unspecified duration to brother-in-law),
-new storage crates for the van,
-four beech folding garden chairs (at least one of which I intend to spend tomorrow night in, happy new year everybody),
-various gardening implements(to be used by my business),
-lengths of chain (various link sizes),
-some nifty plumbing gear,
-assorted handy stuff of no consequence,
-an irrigation system,
-the dearest little skateboard,
-and (strap yourselves into the green seat of envy everybody) a fuck-off-big Dawn engineering vice.
Did I mention they also gave me money?
On an entirely unrelated note, if anybody wants to borrow, rent or buy a Bailey Industrial Extending Ladder(3.7m, flops out to be a real beauty*) feel free to contact me.
10B
----------
*Thankyou Lounge Discounter.
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I have a bunch of green waste - trimmed branches, garden stuff - that needs carting away... am I within your area?
r
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Happy birthday anyway.
My storage space downstairs is full of ladders, but thanks anyway.
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My hovercraft is full of eels